As many of you know, I signed up for National Novel Writing Month this year. I'll have the thirty days of November to write 50,000 words of a novel. There is a "kick-off" party tonight in downtown, and while I wanted to go to that, it would've royally screwed up my important Halloween plans.
But I'm not as worried about not being able to go and meet other nerds, because I totally don't have a plot or character or idea that I want to write about. I sort of brainstormed yesterday but nothing really came of it. I'm still conflicted about a genre. I'm a complete mess. Spies, zombies, astronauts, time travel, romance, erotica? All these are things that I could take on, if only I had an idea to begin with.
The other problem is that I'm so close with a few of my ideas, but far enough that I don't feel confident in sitting down and fleshing them out, figuring out endings and the like. That's usually what really nails me- the end. I'm not good at resolution, usually because I'm not good at setting up conflict. I spend most of my time avoiding conflict at any length and so I lead a unexciting life, free of most conflict.
Conflict is inside all of us, emotional, personal, secret conflicts we don't tell anyone about. Things that eat us up inside, but don't necessarily lead to any action. Many strong and powerful writers, like Hemingway, could write about internal conflict well and personalize it within his characters to the point of making the reader feel almost claustrophobic by the intense issues plaguing the protagonist. Unfortunately, I am no Hemingway.
So it stands that I am a writer without conflict, in search of something interesting and gripping and catalytic.
And it's Halloween(party night at least)! So I'm not going to think about it until tomorrow or Monday.
HERE IS THE BEST HALLOWEEN VIDEO:
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