Rented Tuxedo

My girlfriend was nominated for a Director's Guild Award, for being a part of the daytime serial directing team, of television's "baby-killer" soap, Days of Our Lives. That's pretty impressive, lucrative, amazing, and all sorts of assorted hyperbole that I can't hunt down. She's quite the awesome lady and I am proud to be dating her. Since she is part of the nominated directing team, she is invited to the HUGE awards dinner at the Century City Hyatt Regency. I did not receive an invitation and thought I was going to stay at home on Saturday night and play videogames. Instead, I get a call from my girlfriend Thursday afternoon saying she scored an extra ticket and asking if I wanted to go. "Sure- that sounds like fun!" "Can you rent a tux?" Hmmm...can I rent a tux? This question should be preceded by, "Do I WANT to rent a tux?" As much as I like dressing up, I feel like the tuxedo pales in comparison to a nice suit with a sweet tie, and a modest, but sharp-looking vest. The problem is that I've never been to one of these things so I don't know how important it is to wear a tux and I assume that everyone is going to be in their nicest attire. It is, and they are. So I roll down to "Tuxedos by Mike" Friday morning, the day before the event, hoping that he will have something for me. I walk in right when "Mike" opens up shop(he's standing on his storefront's stoop, smoking a comically large cigar and reading the Hollywood Reporter), and I tell him I need to rent a tux. Mike(thick armenian accent): What kind of tuxedo would you like? First of all, this is the second time I've ever rented a tux. The first was for my junior prom. Somehow, I've figured out how to make it to 23 years old having rented a tux ONCE. Looking back, I remember half a dozen occurrences when I would have had the possibility of wearing a tux. For instance, I was a groomsman at my college roommates wedding; except we wore khaki pants and white shirts with yellow lillies pinned on them. Needless to say, I'm aware of only one kind of tuxedo- the regular one. And since I don't know how strict they are at the Century City Hyatt Regency, I opt for the all black, vest and bowtie, traditional penguin style tuxedo. I change clothes and put on the shirt, the bow tie and the pants and emerge from the dressing room. I'm a young guy, I've got some metal pinned into my face, I was unshaven and probably hadn't showered since the previous morning, and maybe I looked a little ridiculous in the tuxedo, but not like a hobo or anything. "How do I look?" I ask the PROFESSIONAL tuxedo technician(engineer? taylor?) "What event are you going to?" Mike asks me. "The Director's Guild awards." "Oh yes..." as he looks me up and down "Are you working?" So in case you see any press photos of Jake Gyllenhaal or Clint Eastwood or Steven Spielbeg and you recognize me and say, "Hey! Jeff's a banquet waiter! He got to work the DGA awards! That's so cool!" Fuck off, Tuxedos by Mike! Epilogue: Days of Our Lives did not win the award. My girlfriend and I, were a little late(she had to work) and because of that, we didn't receive the following items- salad dressing a wine glass a napkin wine an entree If anyone can find these at the Century City Hyatt Regency, please let me know because the filet mignon Clooney was eating looked really good.

Exhaust

I've been exhausted for the last few days, after having worked for 36 hours straight through the weekend to finish Rob Schrab's Death Cab for Cutie "Crooked Teeth" video. However the final product was well worth the intense effort put into it. I don't think any more stops could have been pulled out for this thing. It's part of a compilation DVD featuring a video for each song on their new album. Apparently, Crooked Teeth is going to be the next single released on the radio and while the DVD will (supposedly) be released in April, they are releasing all the videos online starting next week. I'm proud of the work I did as well as the work of my peers Rob, Morgan, and Sevan. (Not to mention all the other people that came and helped shoot or puppet.) There are some great shots in this thing and I think people are going to be excited to see this insane, drawless animation masterpiece. I don't know when it will appear online for public consumption, but I'll be sure to let MySpace know...

Pre-Production Journal 2 Nov. 30th, 2005 - Cube truck! Cube Truck! Cube Truck!

I think for the fourth time in my life today, I became a man. (For those keeping track- the first was my bris; the second my Bar Mitzvah; the third was in my bedroom with Anne) and today, I drove a huge truck from Hollywood to Burbank and back. This is usually the time that I describe "an exhilarating ride" full of "new experiences and wonderment." In reality, i nearly peed my pants(not a new experience), grew some gray hairs, and probably gave myself an ulcer. It was without a doubt the most terrifying thing I have ever done, because the stakes were so high. I rolled into Burbank, loaded the truck by myself with about fourteen cases of equipment for our HD camera, and rolled back into Hollywood proper. Don't get me wrong- as scared as I was, it was a gratifying, amazing experience I will not soon forget, nor am afraid to do again. In fact, most of the best experiences I've had are either when I am backed into a corner, do-or-die style, or when I remember that that's when I have the best experiences. This list is very long, and while truck driving has the attributes for this type of experience, the whole almost peeing in my pants is keeping it from getting on the list. When i got back to the office, I asked if I could have a co-pilot next time(reading a map in the dark while rolling down the freeway is a lot to do when inexperience with driving a truck). I was promptly denied any help. Great. This is going to be a long three weeks. In the meantime, What should I name my ulcer? (No offense to people in the future that have had ulcers, it was merely used as a comedic device and by no means a jab at any set designers that have or will have ulcers. An ulcer is no laughing matter and should be take in fun, whereas me driving a truck is quite hilarious.)

Pre-Production Journal 1 - Big Meeting

We had the big production meeting/pageturner today. The crew came in and met with the director, went over the script and dealt with any issues that may arise in each department. One of the producers asked me to shoot some BTS footage of the meeting which I did, but as soon as I turned the camera on, I felt awkward having a camera at a meeting I was supposed to be paying attention to, so the camera went off fairly quickly. I've got a lot to do on this show because my full time in the office will quickly be transferred to full time on-set. We've got three locations two of which are going to be larger in scale than the third. The third is just a house in Hancock Park, where we'll generally be having between one and three cast members on set at a time. It's going to be an interesting three weeks, and at the very least, an exhausting three weeks, but I'm kind of looking forward to making a movie right before everyone breaks for the holidays. I'm going up north for...I think this will be the fourth year in a row working my girlfriend's mom's comedy show. Even though i work, it still feels very vacation-like being in Palo Alto(a quiet mountain town). I also love going into San Francisco. The Exploratorium, drinking at Vesuvio's, City Lights, The Buccaneer(pirate bar), and 826 Valencia. whoa. I'm really excited now. But first, i need to make a movie. T-2 days.

I'M IN A PLAY TOMORROW!!!

It's called:   Go Fuck Yourself, Jury Duty!

File Under: You have GOT to be kidding

Via Yahoo News: "It is the adults who should be afraid this Halloween. Not of ghouls and goblins, but of permanently scarring their children. In a recent study of six- and seven-year-olds in the Philadelphia area, Penn State psychologist Cindy Dell Clark found that most parents underestimate just how terrifying the holiday can be for young kids." This is a joke, right? The article continues, "Halloween has been scaring the heck out of kids of all ages for centuries....Child psychologists generally caution parents that the fright of some aspects of Halloween can be too much for the very young, and advise adults to keep a close eye on children and remind them of what is real and what is not." Here's my reasoning: When you know of ONE DAY out of the ENTIRE year that you are going to go DOOR TO DOOR to collect CANDY, perhaps at the expense of someone in a rubber mask jumping out at you, perhaps startling you, how could ANYONE NOT BE PREPARED?! We know as society that there is one day every year a fat old man, crawls down our chimney and into our living room to leave presents under a pagan symbol of worship decorated with ecclesiastical glass orbs and angels, while we celebrate someone dying the most painful death imaginable and suffering the pain of every human in the history of time. We know that there is one day every year an enormous mutated anthropomorph hides colored eggs(which it cannot lay) that you search your backyard to find. WE ARE CREATING A SOCIETY OF PUSSIES. Here's the rebuttal to any argument that entails a kid getting scared at young age: My girlfriend HATES being startled. When she gets startled it could very likely bring her to tears. Or she'll start throwing punches. Eitehr way, it's not a pretty sight. I would love to go to the haunted houses at Knott's Scary Farm, The Queen Mary, or anywhere else, but she will NEVER want to go. You may say that this puts a damper on Halloween for her, but the reality is that Halloween is her favorite holiday in the history of the human species. She loves it more than anyone else I know. So regardless of her being scared as a little kid, she still LOVES Halloween. It's not Halloween that's the problem, it's not even the people that startle her, because she knows to stay away from those things, in this case, we are telling children that it's OK to be wimps. I can't think of anything more assinine, thick-headed, retarded, or irresponsible. Besides, there is nothing to change about Halloween to make it more kid-friendly. It's already a kid's holiday! You dress up like a hobo, run around your neighborhood and collect candy. If someone doesn't like Halloween, that's fine. It's OK to NOT LIKE something, but I am giving you the permission to do so on your own. You don't need a study or parents or doctors to tell you that putting a Ronald Reagon mask on and carrying around a pillowcase full of chocolate is a bad thing. I am giving kids all over permission to decide on Halloween by themselves.

The Neon Cruise

I lucked out. Saturday night, my girlfriend and her two best friends were going out together to celebrate one of the girls' birthdays, but when one of them couldn't make it, I got to tag along. We ended up on the Neon Cruise through Los Angeles. They run it every Saturday night through the summer, June until the beginning of October and it always sells out. My girlfriend had made reservations but it was previously sold out so they ended up on the waiting list. The day before the cruise, Friday, they found out they had seats so it was a bummer that their friend couldn't go with them. You meet down at the Museum of Neon, which I had been to before, but had never been on the famed cruise. There is a wine and cheese reception beforehand, so you can mill around the museum, enjoying illuminated impressions of days past, or glowing glass of colored gas. The wine is an important element for the three hour journey. You'll be on the top level of a double decker convertible bus, so while you can dress your outside as warm as possible, you'll definitely need something to warm the insides as well. You may want to invest in a hip flask if you're going on the neon cruise. But the cruise, the cruise itself is like a journey through an LA that you can only wish existed to this day. It really shows us the history of this city from a different perspective; one of promise and entrepeneurship, something that has, in my opinion, been lacking in this city, in this country for the last decade. It feels like there was a desire for technology and excitement and entertainment to collide and create, above all, a better life for all. When the Packard dealership on Wilshire first introduced neon to America, the buzz it created was not only important to signage for years to come, but it obviously changed the way Americans were mesmerized. Eric, the smarmy, sarcastic, and incredibly funny, tour guide lead us through an intriguing history. When we reached Hollywood, he began to lament the introduction of "backlit plastic," the signage that effectively eliminated the need for neon signs. Cheap and economical, you can much more with a backlit plastic sign than you can with blown glass neon tubes, I understand what happened. But it made me think that it also changed the way we dealt with that blend of technology and entertainment. We added business. Now it wasn't about making people excited about something new any more. It was about getting them into a store, selling them something, and getting the next guy in the store. That's it. That's where we've come to and what is driving our country the argument of art versus business and whether the two are individuals or influencing to each other. Does one have to breed the other? Are the two allowed to live harmoniously? Or are we slashing our cities' wrists by making our advertisements bigger, louder, and brighter, and letting our distilled artistic impulses languish in smaller venues, collecting dust, decomposing, and running out of power? The neon cruise is something of wonder and excitement that helps us realize what things were and how things can be when people work together and appreciate ingenuity and experimentation, while requiring boundries. Like a delicate glass tube of exploding gas, a dedicated column on the periodic table of elements, sharp lines of brightly colored light that we can form in any way and to acheive any message, so long as the gas doesn't escape or the switch isn't turned off.